Who the hell is Pete?

I would like to welcome everyone to my psyche! There is limited admission to my psyche and admission is granted only to those who agree to sign a contract to not even TRY to make me over. There is no room for that in here. Some of you may not know: my psyche recently underwent renovations! The head designer was famous Canadian designer Candace Olson (not to be confused with the Olsen twins), host of popular HGTV show, Divine Design!

For my first entry, I thought I'd introduce you to a fine young man. You can call him Pedro or Pete and he is my grandpa!

It's funny because "Pete" is like my grandpa's American name, but its like, what's so hard about saying Pedro? And even some of our relatives will call him "Uncle Pete" and I'm just thinking like, who the hell is Pete? Anyway, in his spare time, Pete loves to garden, climb over fences, get into fights with his adult children, complain about how his doctor took away his driver's license and start to cry almost every time I visit him. He also loves going to Las Vegas and Laughlin with his sexy Senior Citizen friends. He is 92 years old, I think. If you ever want some umpilya, merlitons, cherry tomatoes, baguio beans or other vegetables, he will happily give you some! Just don't ask him about what he thinks about some of his other relatives, because to that, he might just reply: Don't even get me started!